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How Do I Shove Thee? Feb. 08, 2022
I'm a 31-year-old gay man. I have these intrusive lusty thoughts about my ex, like daily. I'm extrem... Read More
All the Junk Food Tom Brady Should Eat in Retirement Feb. 05, 2022
Congratulations, Tom Brady, on retiring from football and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers this past week af... Read More
Buddy Odor Feb. 01, 2022
I'm a woman in my mid-20s. In the last year, I've noticed that a number of my core friends have begu... Read More
'Let's Go Brandon': The Intersection of Humor and Reality Jan. 27, 2022
When President Joe Biden and First Lady Jill Biden spoke with children and NORAD authorities monitor... Read More
Make Your Home Office a Moneymaker Jan. 27, 2022
It's inevitable. Sooner or later, you're going back to working at work. Or maybe you've already bee... Read More
The Doctor Is In Jan. 25, 2022
"Oh, no!" I exclaimed to my husband. "My giant yucca plant is sick." He glanced over from the couch.... Read More
May The Divorce Be With You Jan. 25, 2022
My apartment building has paper-thin walls, and I overhear a lot of what goes on between the couple ... Read More
I Accidentally Put My Number on HomeAdvisor and Now I Perish Jan. 22, 2022
"A Fool's Journey," by William Shakespeare's lesser cousin, Phil Shakespeare: The fool notices a dea... Read More
Needy Gonzales Jan. 18, 2022
I've saved some of your columns about how women evolved to seek successful men who seem commitment-m... Read More
Is it a Cold or COVID-19, and Will I Ever Escape This Mental Prison? Jan. 15, 2022
Thanks to the omicron variant, there are roughly 70 flagrillion cases of COVID-19 in the country. Om... Read More
Downward Doghouse Jan. 11, 2022
There's a woman in my yoga class I'd like to ask out. Though she's friendly to me, I worry that this... Read More
COVID-19 Office Protocol: Green Means Hug Me, Blue Means EW, GROSS Jan. 08, 2022
Maybe you have returned to an office setting or will soon. This is a carefree experience not at all ... Read More
Rust Issues Jan. 04, 2022
My husband and I are in our 50s, married 25 years. I married for life, but I didn't expect our initi... Read More
Petition to Cancel the Week Between Christmas and New Year's Jan. 01, 2022
ERASE THE WEEK BETWEEN CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR'S FROM: PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE TO: A BENEVOLENT PERSON(S... Read More
2022 Career Resolution No. 1: Turn off Your Brain Dec. 30, 2021
Committed to career success? When you turn your computer on, turn your brain off. I understand your... Read More
You've Got Kale! Dec. 28, 2021
"We're going to eat more kale in 2022," I said to my husband. He looked at me morosely. "Why? What d... Read More
Truth Ache Dec. 28, 2021
I spent an entire Sunday with a really cute guy I met through a dating app. We kissed a bit, and I s... Read More
A New Year's Prayer for an Average, Boring, Unremarkable 2022 Dec. 25, 2021
Shh. Everyone be quiet. Don't rustle. Are you sure you want to wear such a noisy dress? Sequins are ... Read More
Careerwise, It's the End of the Year, Not the End of the World Dec. 23, 2021
Allow me, please, to wish you happy holidays. And now that we've got that behind us, let's acknowled... Read More
Bear With Me Dec. 21, 2021
After a challenging autumn, I decided to take a mini vacation by myself to a cabin in the woods for ... Read More
